Disappointments are Inevitable, Misery is a Choice

I just watched one of my favorite most inspirational speakers: Joel Osteen. He's the charismatic, Colgate smile wearing, glossy-haired televangelist known to ignite his uber congregation with sermons centering on positivity and the Creator's planned goodness for us all.
Yes, at first glance he might appear to be a slick snake-oil salesman with a Cheshire cat grin. Initially you might be suspicious and think he's just another fast-talking preacher peddling hope to the desperate masses in exchange for their hard-earned dollars. You might be waiting for the "shakedown" when he asks for viewers to send a dollar amount in exchange for his prayers on their behalf.
But eventually, you'll be pleasantly surprised that the man stays very focused on delivering his message and spreading the power of positivity. He emphatically stresses that the Creator has a plan for each of our lives. That we need only have the faith to follow it.
He always sprinkles jokes in his sermons. Mary Poppins always said a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, and Osteen wisely blends his biblical based message with the perfect pinch of laughs.
I often catch two different sermons from him on Sunday evenings. One comes on at 8pm, the other 12 midnight. I just finished watching one in which he discussed disappointment, something I've been struggling with these past few days.
Thankfully, it's been a wonderful weekend. A weekend that rendered my disappointment a distant memory as I indulged in a great conversation with a young guy who, with his brother, started an online magazine for which they'd like me to be copyeditor; laughed with my spouse and enjoyed our time spent at our 71-year-old uncle's surprise birthday party; watched a movie with my sister, and read some interesting books.
It's been a relaxing and soothing weekend that was just what the doctor ordered. I know my last post was pretty angry. I considered deleting it, but am trying to learn to accept the full emotional spectrum and to give each shade it's respect and outlet.
But Osteen said tonight that, "Disappointments are inevitable, misery is a choice." He went on to caution that we not let "the sun set on our anger."
It's okay to feel disappointment that things haven't gone the way you wanted. But you owe yourself the wonderful release of letting your disappointment out at the end of the day. Don't hold it in, don't harp on it, don't let it marinate. Just like a computer, shut your disappointment down at day's end, allow yourself the mental, physical, and psychological rest and then reboot in the morning. But for goodness' sake, don't tug the disappointment around day after day like a sack.
So I have faith that in this thing called life, good things await me. Through all the sharp turns, the unexpected occurrences, and yes, the disappointments, I will keep the faith and believe. I believe that the Creator is making a way for my big dreams to come true. After all, like seeds in soil, he planted these dreams in my heart, tucked them safe in my soul so that they'd germinate. I give it all to Him and surrender to Him to show me the way. To guide me. To lead me. I thank Him for His mercy. For the love he has filled my life with. For my loving spouse, my mother, father, sisters and friends. For the peace he gives me. For this life and this adventure he has blessed me to have.

Ugggh!

The urge to feel down on myself is so tempting sometimes.
Once again, I'm working as an administrative assistant in a field I have absolutely no interest in. I am so sick of stapling, copying, collating, booking conference rooms and performing every conceivable type of monkey work that I am beside myself. Sometimes I feel like I can't stand it another second.
What the hell am I doing? I keep asking myself.
Don't get me wrong. I've got a B.A. in Journalism with a minor in business. Did the right thing. Went to college and earned a pricey degree. Now what?
Now that I've been tossed from the secure cocoon of my university and flung out into the Darwinian cut throatness of the real world...NOW WHAT????
Where the hell are all the jobs? Where the hell are all the great salaries we were all promised so long as we were good little students and went to college?
Yes, there are times when I've felt hoodwinked, bamboozled and like a damn fool for jumping through so many hoops to finally get my coveted degree. But words are a creative force, and a life of regret is not what I want to build for myself.
I'd rather live a life of hope, fulfillment and meaning.
I'd rather reach out and light up someone else's life so that the lightbulb can switch on for my own.
Sometimes I feel so tired of feeling like I'm stumbling around in the dark. So tired of feeling like if I'd have known then what I know now, I'd have done it differently. Sometimes I feel like I'm constantly trying to catch up. Feeling like where I am now is where I ought to have been three years ago. Feeling like I'm never where I should be, when I should be there.